Whewwww I made it through last week, alive, in one piece, and in a better place mentally.
Last week was the roughest week I’ve experienced thus far during my prep. I was an extremely emotional wreck, starving, had crazy mood swings, insane food cravings, and was on the verge of tears every second of the day. It took A LOT of effort to keep those tears from falling while at work. I was constantly sighing, batting my eyes and looking up at the ceiling so they wouldn’t fall. I mentally and physically felt heavy, anxious, and down right depressed. I couldn’t think of ONE single reason WHY I was doing this, I lost every ounce of motivation.
Would you be surprised if I told you it was ‘that time’ as well?
That explained EVERYTHING.
I’m in MUCH better spirits today, feeling motivated, ready to smash out the next 5 weeks and own the stage! I’ve decided that I’m done picking apart my body and I’m done finding something wrong with every square inch of myself. It’s mentally draining to be so self-critical, and that only puts stress on my body. My body can hear my thoughts, and I believe that thoughts have an effect on your body, mind, and how you perform. So from now on, I’m going to appreciate my body for the amazing progress it has made these past few months, and the fact that it is healthy and performing better every time I’m in the gym. I’m amazed at how far I’ve taken myself already, and I know I’m only going to improve the next 5 weeks. I’ve learned so much from this experience already! I never in a million years would have thought I would ACTUALLY enter a Bikini Competition. I’ve always dreamed about it, trained like I might one day, but never thought it would happen.
Some of my favorite things that I’ve learned would be learning how to workout efficiently to deliver maximum results. I have always prided myself on my knowledge of exercise and health, but this experience has opened my eyes to a whole new world! The possibilities are endless, you can use your creativity to carve your body into ultimately anything you want! It’s freakin’ cool! I’ve done so much research, have tried different experiments, have learned through trial and error what my body responds best to. Now I know how to write my weekly workouts, pair my exercises to keep my heart rate up and challenge different muscle groups, and keep my body guessing through: bodyweight exercises, plyometrics, weight lifting, swimming, spin biking, HIIT treadmill intervals, TRX resistance training, weight lifting etc. I finally grew a pair and learned how to squat in the squat rack like a big girl!
I have also learned how to cook. Cooking has NEVER been a very strong area for me. The extent of my cooking was diced up chicken breast fried in a pan, or chicken pasta. O, and Kraft Mac n’ Cheese from a box, duh. Now I am experimenting with the crock pot, baking my chicken in the oven and getting real friendly with spices and herbs. I can make killer turkey muffins, oatmeal pancakes, delicious turkey and/or chicken wraps, egg white omelets with paprika and cayenne, kale salad with cottage cheese and almond slices, and so much more. I’ve learned how to bake healthy alternatives to foods I enjoy. I had never heard of a ‘mug cake’ before! Best invention EVER! I have a board on Pinterest with all the recipes I want to try post competition. Freakin’ STOKED!
Not to mention, I learned A LOT about macros and nutrition, and how to calculate your needs for your fitness goals. I had no idea what macros were, how many grams of each I should be consuming, what days I should be eating more carbs than other days etc. Thanks to the internet, I have learned plenty and plan on using a lot of what I learned post comp as well. Huge thanks to myfitnesspal app for making my prep so easy, this app is a definite life saver for any competitor!
I want to thank everybody that I’ve met, or have yet to meet (over social media!) for your love and support throughout this whole experience. Without the kind words of so many of you, I may have given up by now, or caved in my diet and thrown in the towel. You guys have seriously been the BEST! Just when I think that no one reads my posts, someone speaks up to tell me how inspired they are, how I’m doing an amazing job, and to tell me to keep trucking along! There have been some down right UGLY ASS days and you guys make them a thousand times brighter and better with your encouragement! I appreciate each and every one of you, for real 🙂
On that note, I hope everyone has a stupendous week 🙂